Well, I was brought back down to earth immediately.
I have had to lower my expectations to slightly above NONE.
I am too exhausted between therapy sessions to do much work and I feel too empty to be inspired and do create work.
I am supposed to ENJOY my shows and podcasts and not see them as a duty.
At first, I could not even concentrate enough to read a book or watch a TV show or movies; all I did for days was s sit and look out the window (thank goodness for the view!!!!); everything felt too much and I was just overwhelmed.
Now, however, I have gained back to luxury of being able to concentrate enough to devour books and watch 2-hour long movies. YAY for that! I am literally grabbing on to my books after every single meal. They serve as the perfect distraction. I can escape into a different world and just leave the feelings and thoughts. that are so hard to bear, behind.
Being able to enjoy books again is the first positive aspect of being in therapy and I am beyond delighted about it.
As for being creative; that is not really possible yet. I hardly find the words to write in my journal nor do I have the creative outbursts I used to have to create all kinds of awesome illustrations and graphics. But I am sure that, if I am patient, this too will come back.
I just have to be patient… If only it wasn’t that hard. 😉